Wear Lipstick That is Too Dark

I have a real flair for the dramatics, especially when it comes to dressing and my lipstick choices.  In my new found career though I spend most days in Polyester-Wool Blend uniforms.  I value the occasional brunch that deserves heels and I have come to terms with dressing up for no reason other than to run errands.  I have also learned that sometimes in life you just have to put on the killer "fashion girl" outfit, wear lipstick that is too dark, and blast some Taylor Swift or gangster rap.  This among these next 10 lessons are what I have learned while surviving my pre-quarter life crisis.

Lipstick: Marc Jacobs / Top: Kate Spade (worn backwards) / Pants: JCrew

lesson #1: Everyone fails in their 20's
      I kid you not, everyone.  Just google someone you admire or who aspire to be like and see where they were in their 20's.  This when you get to quit jobs and travel.  This is when you figure out who you are and what you want.  So go out and fail.  Fail hard.  Keep doing it again and again until you find yourself and what you want.

lesson #2: Keep kissing losers
      Kiss all of them! Kissing burns calories (see below).  Kissing releases endorphins and those make you happy.  Kissing losers will make appreciate the winner when you kiss him too.  So keep kissing!

lesson #3: Eat the cupcakes (and popeye's and pizza and all the other "bad" food)
      There is nothing wrong with indulging in the delicious things in life.  Enjoy them because one day they will make you really fat and it won't be fun anymore.  So for now indulge and if you feel like you must, go to the gym or a hot yoga class.

lesson #4: Leave your comfort zone
      For me, it was leaving all the sure and practical options behind and taking up life at 35000 feet.  If it terrifies you, you should do it.  Someone famous once said that but I can't remember who.  The farther you get from your comfort zone the more you learn about yourself.  (one more way to discover who you are!)

lesson #5: Wear ballgowns to lunch and heels to the grocery store
      You have to get it where you can!  Dress up for no reason at all.  Or do the opposite and don't dress up, wear sweats all day and be really effing comfortable!  You can never be overdressed, because if you are people will just think you are coming from somewhere better or going somewhere better.  Also, if you are in leggings with a giant shirt on people think you just came from a spin class with Victoria's Secret models but,  jokes on them because you might have just rolled out of bed, they'll never know!

lesson #6: Find your red
      Of the 10 red lipsticks I own, there are 2 I love.  I have yet to find the exact shade of red I truly want to become my signature red, though.  Red lipstick fixes everything and it makes you look like a badass so find your shade.

lesson #7: Find your moisturizer
      Mine is Clinique Superdefense.  It is a daily moisturizer with SPF and prevents aging.  It also combats free radicals and radiation which I am exposed to at higher than normal levels being a flight attendant.  You want to be a hot 30-year-old and an even hotter 40/50/60-year-old so start treating your skin right now.  Give it the best chance it has against what life will throw at it.

lesson #8: You don't have to party like you did in college to be a cool kid
      Don't get me wrong, I can still party, but it is no longer something I find myself obligated to do.  While I can no longer drink frat boys under the table, you'll almost never find me dancing on a table, and I spend more nights enjoying a glass of wine instead of handles of flammable vodka, that doesn't mean a good time isn't necessary sometimes.  There are a million other ways to be a cool kid too, though.  Go out and have a good time if you want to but this is not recruitment, you are no longer required to be blackout.

lesson #9: Drink the wine, the whiskey, the vodka and the Pina Coladas
       Stock you bar cart for the rainy day drink, the roommate had a shit day drink, you had a shit day drink, the celebratory drink, and the well we have the alcohol so we should drink it, drink.  We always have at least one bottle of wine in the house.  Currently, we have 4 bottles of wine and vodka, we are clearly ready to party!  Champagne Thursday is also a holiday everyone should celebrate (it is ok if Thursday comes every day too)

lesson #10: Find your Band of Bitches:  Mine are scattered all over the world.  I have a few fabulous queens who give me life and who are the most fabulous bitches I know.  I have two roommates who are the Destiny to my Child (G is Beyonce).  Then there is Miss Arkansas who I swear is my soulmate.  And of course, there is my little hippie dream aka training roomie!  Then there are the original bitches who are mentioned in the orginal band of bitches post.  Everyone needs a band, and coming from the girl who is really good at being alone, if I think you need one, you do.

Bag: Target customized by Me / Sandals: Target

 xxx
B

Long List of Ex Lovers

Disclaimer:  No boys were hurt in the making of this post, ok maybe just one or two (I kid).

      I have dated every type of guy there is and loved just about as many of them.  I claim to be a cold hearted, love hating, and black soul bearing girl when it comes to romance, but truthfully I see the best in people. I have taken a flying leap of faith for guys more often than I care to admit.  With that in mind, I would like to introduce to you to my long list of ex-lovers (well some of the more memorable ones I should say).  I loved and lost and while some of them I had relationships with and some were boys I just couldn't make stick around they all have a story or better yet a song.  I hope you find my trials and tribulations an inspiration to keep kissing boys or girls or both to find your love story.  After all Taylor Swift got hers.

Continue to share your heart with people even if it has been broken.

-Amy Poehler, Harvard Speech

Fifteen: When you are 15 and somebody tells you they love you, you're going to believe them.  He was my first everything.  At 15 then 16 I thought he was it.   Baseball star and the boy who called me out on my not so black heart, the first boy I flew across a country for, and the first boy to break my heart.  From NM to FL he was my teenage love story that set the tone for years and years to come.  Back then I swore I was going to marry him someday but I realized some bigger dreams of mine.  Cause when you're 15 you give everything you have to boys who change their minds.

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together:  This is just exhausting.  Everyone will date someone who you seem to constantly have in your life.  You dated, then became friends, talked about dating again, dated other people, are still friends, and then talk about dating again.  You have so much history and you've been there for each other through the best times and the worst, but eventually you wake up and realize your "relationship" is exhausting and gosh always so dramatic.  At this point, you have to just spare each others feelings and say you are never ever ever getting back together like ever.

Innocent: Every girl will at some point date a bad boy, mine was rock n roll dream.  Problem with bad boys is they are filled with trouble.  But I learned to just sit back and enjoy the music, to live with a certain amount of passion from him.  It was a brief moment shared, but I know I will always find him in certain towns on buses with bands.  Just know, your string of lights is still bright to me, Oh, who you are is not what you've been.  You're still an innocent.  It's okay, life is a tough crowd, 32, and still growin' up now, who you are is not what you did. You're still an innocent. Time turns flames to embers.  You'll have new Septembers, every one of us has messed up too. Minds change like the weather I hope you remember today is never too late to be brand new.

Begin Again: There I was all dressed in black staring out the window silently hoping no one would sit next to me when you stopped and asked if the seat was taken.  I took one look at you and knew this was going to be an interesting flight.  I was going to Chicago, first time back since moving and you were heading home.  You thought I was funny and said you'd never met a girl quite like me.  We talk about your soccer career and whiskey and our families like we were catching up over coffee.  You offer to get my bags for me and grab me a cab and you have no idea how nice that is.  I say goodbye and you kiss my cheek and just like that I watched it begin again.  I'd spent the last 8 months thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end but on that day on a plane, I watched it begin again.

Bad Blood:  You were the nice guy till you weren't.    My parents loved you, always a gentleman, held my hand, opened doors, and smiled at me like I was something more.  Smooth on TV and smooth with me.  Last time I saw you I thought we actually stood a chance.   Bandaids don't fix bullet holes, you love like that blood runs cold.  It used to be mad love so take a look, a look what you've done because baby now we got bad blood.  If you're coming my way just don't.

I’m just not interested in the things that won’t last forever.

-	John Mayer ( Interview: ‘Recovered Ego Addict’)

Clean:  You told my best friend you were in love with me so I took a chance on the boy who was supposed to be "the nice guy", it was snowing and I realized I was falling, then it was spring and I was sure of you.  You never let me hold the umbrella because when I did you ended up wet, I taught you that cerulean was a color and danced around your bedroom to Fleetwood Mac.  Summer came with one sided I love you's but with fireworks in July came hope with your arms wrapped around me and the pictures to prove it, until August when you said goodbye.  It was months and months of back and forth, you were all over me like a wine-stained dress I can't wear anymore.  Hung my head, as I lost the war and the sky, turned black like a perfect storm.  10 months sober I must admit just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it.  

Dear John/ Wonderland:  Flashing lights and we took a wrong turn and we fell down a rabbit hole.  You held on tight to me because nothing is as it seems.  We found wonderland you and I got lost in it and life was never worse but never better.  I reached for you, but you were gone.  You search the world for something else that makes you feel like what we had, and in the end in Wonderland we both went mad.  It was the first day of my new life when you introduced yourself to me, then the next day you surprised me by remembering me.  Weeks passed with quick hellos and I never would've thought that a month later I would be making you fall in love with New York.  Serendipity, kisses on street corners, eating our way through NYC and conversations about everything we wanted out of life.  I showed you all the places that inspired me and little did you know you'd inspire me too.  I finally thought I had got it right.  I will miss our conversations and hell I'll miss you.  You call yourself a monster, but I know deep down you're just scared to try.  I should've listened to your warnings, should've never given you too much time, but I saw how good, good could be and ignored all the warning signs.  And you'll add my name to the long list of others who just don't understand and I'll look back and regret not listening when they said run as fast as you can.  You are an expert at "sorry" and keeping lines blurry.  (I'll see you in an airport someday)

You will kiss hundreds of frogs, you will cry millions of tears, and you will have thousands of adventures in the search of love.  Fight for love and love all the stupid boys even if just for a minute.  I promise you every jerk who breaks your heart will teach you a lesson about yourself and while you might lose the boy, I hope you find yourself, and I hope that just like for me that somehow that is everything.

If you gotta force it, just leave it alone. Relationships, friendships, ponytails.. Just leave it.

-Reyna Biddy xxx B

Thank you, Taylor Swift,  for writing exactly what all of us girls think and feel!

Misery Business

I learned something today, nothing in life is worth being miserable over.  If you aren't happy get the hell out of dodge.  No apologies needed just go and find your happiness.  Being 23 is weird enough, no idea where my life is going, let alone how I am going to pay my bills because I had to have those $300 shoes and I really did need to eat the most expensive thing on the menu last night.  This is my life and believe me I'm well aware that my decisions are reckless but those shoes are killer and my meal was delicious.  So why should I spend any of my time being miserable, well believe me I am so over it.  Nothing and I mean nothing is worth it.

This leads to an important life lesson, growing up is about being honest.  Honest about what I want, what I need, what I feel and who I am.

That being said so far I know that I want a job I like and a guy whom I love.  Also I have decided that I want to be a force to be reckoned with, the kinda girl who walks into a room and you know she has arrived, the girl who walks like murder, laughs like nothing you've ever heard, and is the kinda girl you can't get enough of.  I have this very romantic sense of how I want life to be and I am sure as hell going to make my little dream world a reality.  I have always dreamed of this life I could have, so why not start having it now?  I dare anyone to tell me no...

Sometimes life doesn't come up all roses, believe me but maybe if I start being honest, being you know me, things will get rosier on the horizon.  Since recently quitting the misery I am already 10x the person I was yesterday so I can't begin to imagine who I am going to be by tomorrow.

My advice get honest, real honest.

xxx
B